December in Bandung

Today is the second today of december, I've realized yesterday I had make a lot of mistake.
I'm out of my mind now. So many mistake I had made, I don't know how to fix this..

Many people hate me now, in the past I have lot of friends, today I have a lot of enemy more than my friend, yesterday I have so much that care about me, today I haven't. No one..

I fly too higher, to catch my dream, to show my dignity, to make everyone know me.

But I was too high so they hate me, When I tried to care about myself, spend my time to look at me, concern about myself. My friend doesn't like it. They tried to plan hatred on me one by one, provoking, and talk badly.

It's different.. I can see it, I know it, selfish, ego, I can see it cleary in front of me.. Sorry If I had make so mistake, I don't care you all as I do in the past, I break my vow,..
I don't hate you guys! I bought your name everytime I pray, whether this ain't my fault or yes,, I'll keep pray. try to fix myself everyday,. never to take this problem seriously.

What in my mind now is to fix myself, and my relation with God, I know everytime when I tried to getting nearer to Him I have face so many problem more than I had face, sometimes I'm tired.. all my plan isn't work at all , when I pray it getting worse, but after facing the worstest day, I became stronger, I know how to do better, I understand how to understand others, I realize how big GOD plan for me, though is harder than I think, In the end it give me values that why I want to fix my relation with GOD and my friend , not with enforcement but with love.

GOD thanks, you make me better everytime forgive me for what I have made, I know You're are the only one that know the best plan for me not me.

In this december I would fix everything, I would bring joy of happiness around me. No more disguise and without trick.

this all me, real me..